The Return of the Ex

OK so maybe he never really left. But we did stop having sex so in my mind that means he left at least a little.

I see the ex a few times each week. This past week we had dinner together on Monday and then again on Saturday. On Saturday night he invited himself to stay over night. He did stay over night. He slept in the same bed as me, but no we didn't have sex. As much as he might like to - or I might like to, it is not going to happen. I can't and won't let it happen. Just not in the cards right now.

Regardless of the lack of sex, he managed to get under my skin full force by Sunday. I found myself letting him sleep in while I hummed to myself and prepared breakfast. It is so easy to fall into our life together.

As soon as I realize what I'm doing my mood changes. Cranky is an understatement. I'm a mega bitch and he comes out with "It is like I am falling in love with you all over again."

I can't take it. I am a puddle on the floor. I am a crying sobbing mess and I tell him he has to leave. As I lock the door behind him I press my back against the cold metal of the door and slowly slide down to the floor. I let myself cry. Really cry. Floods of tears. Raw emotion. I relish in it for a split second then think better of it. I collect myself, wash my face and get on with my life.